The Problem...
As a lot of us are doing these days, I've been sending out resumés to prospective employers. Crafting the best possible resumé and getting it noticed is our primary concern. Combined with the fact that I'm ultimately looking for a career as a photographer, the visual impact of my resumé is very important to me. I decided on an 8 1/2x11 brochure that folds open to 11x17, giving enough room to add some photographs. I have a printer that will print 11x17, but not easily on the heavier paper, or without smudging. So off I went to my local copy center.
The Search...
The guy at the copy center was very nice and helpful. He got the paper I wanted and ran a test copy. Oh no! The black and white photo on the cover looked more like it had turned into a poster. The shading was all compressed and not blending. Ugh! We decided it must be the PDF screwing things up, so he suggested saving it in Photoshop or Illustrator format. Just to be sure, I went to a copy center/office supply store down the street and tried again. Nope, still a poster picture.
My document file wouldn't easily convert to Illustrator, so I had to lay out my whole resumé again in the new format. I went back to the office supply store and tried again. Yes! The image looked like a photograph. No! Now there was a funky line running through the image. Ugh! The lady who was helping me thought there was a problem with their printer, so she would call technical support to fix it. She called the next day to say it was fixed, so I returned that evening, hopeful that I would get my resumé this time. Ugh! Still a funky line! She said she would call and have technical support come out again.
Discouraged, I went back to the original copy center to see if they could print it, now that it was in the format they suggested. This time the person who came to help me was a real jerk. First he tried the Illustrator file, but it wouldn't open because they have an older version than I do. Then he saw the PDF and wanted to try printing that. I explained the problem with the PDF, but he wouldn't listen to me. I think he though he was smarter than the employee who helped me before. So he ran a test, and yep, poster picture again. When I showed him the problem, he didn't understand what the big deal was. He thought that should be good enough for me. I explained very nicely that I needed it to look like a photograph and I couldn't use that copy. So he TOSSED my flash drive across the counter at me, turned, and walked away. I was shocked and speechless! I wasn't even being a crabby customer! This was too much, so I just left. I wish I had taken his name so I could complain later. I will never get copies there again!
The next day I went to an office supply store in a different city. I had a very nice lady help me. I explained that their other location couldn't print the file without the funky line. Her first attempt was a poster picture, but after a few tweaks, she got it fixed. And best of all, no line! Finally, I would get my copies. But wait! Then I found out, for some reason, they don't have the same paper as their sister location. Ugh! She called up the store by my house to verify, sure enough, not the same paper. But they did say that the technician had come out and the funky line should be gone now. I was so close to victory, I could taste it. Although it tasted a little like citrus to me. hmmmm. So off I went, back to the first store, with visions of resumés dancing in my head. I walked in, went up to the counter, explained who I was, and waited with bated breath. Oh yes, she assured me, the techinican was out yesterday afternoon and it should all be fixed. Yesterday afternoon? I was there last night after the technician had been out and it still wasn't right. Ugh! Ok, that did it. Now we had crossed over into the ridiculous. That's the signpost up ahead! Your next stop--The TwiLime Zone! She said she could give me paper to take to the other store. I had just come back to my side of town, and I really didn't want to go back there again. She said she'd call tech support again and call me the next day. She didn't.
The Solution...
It was time to take matters into my own hands. I redesigned my resumé layout into a standard two page 8 1/2x11 and printed it on nice medium-weight paper. I went to the office supply store and bought some brochure pockets for holding the finished resumés. I even asked if they had some Astrobright lime business envelopes. I figured it would get the envelope noticed by the employer, and would be a great inside joke. No such luck, of course.
Conclusion...
After all this work, I hope I at least get an interview from one of my resumés. Maybe I should have included a copy of this blog post!
The next day I went to an office supply store in a different city. I had a very nice lady help me. I explained that their other location couldn't print the file without the funky line. Her first attempt was a poster picture, but after a few tweaks, she got it fixed. And best of all, no line! Finally, I would get my copies. But wait! Then I found out, for some reason, they don't have the same paper as their sister location. Ugh! She called up the store by my house to verify, sure enough, not the same paper. But they did say that the technician had come out and the funky line should be gone now. I was so close to victory, I could taste it. Although it tasted a little like citrus to me. hmmmm. So off I went, back to the first store, with visions of resumés dancing in my head. I walked in, went up to the counter, explained who I was, and waited with bated breath. Oh yes, she assured me, the techinican was out yesterday afternoon and it should all be fixed. Yesterday afternoon? I was there last night after the technician had been out and it still wasn't right. Ugh! Ok, that did it. Now we had crossed over into the ridiculous. That's the signpost up ahead! Your next stop--The TwiLime Zone! She said she could give me paper to take to the other store. I had just come back to my side of town, and I really didn't want to go back there again. She said she'd call tech support again and call me the next day. She didn't.
The Solution...
It was time to take matters into my own hands. I redesigned my resumé layout into a standard two page 8 1/2x11 and printed it on nice medium-weight paper. I went to the office supply store and bought some brochure pockets for holding the finished resumés. I even asked if they had some Astrobright lime business envelopes. I figured it would get the envelope noticed by the employer, and would be a great inside joke. No such luck, of course.
Conclusion...
After all this work, I hope I at least get an interview from one of my resumés. Maybe I should have included a copy of this blog post!
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